Just
for Fun!
A
collection of silly halloween jokes to make you laugh (or groan!) Email us with your
jokes, and we might add them in to our list! (Remember to tell
us your first name and city, so we can give you credit!)
Q.
Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?
A. They're afraid of flying off the handle!
Q.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
A. No body
Q.
What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
A. Bone appetit !
Q.
Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A. Day-scare centers
Q.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
A. His ghoul-friend.
Q.
What monster flies his kite in a rain storm?
A. Benjamin Frankenstein
Q.
What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A. Ice Scream
Q.
What's a monster's favorite play?
A. Romeo and Ghouliet
Q.
What do witches put on their hair?
A. Scare Spray
Q.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A. BamBOO!
Q.
What's a haunted chicken?
A. A poultry-geist
Q.
Why did the monster eat a light bulb?
A. Because he wanted a lite snack!
Q.
Why are most monsters covered in wrinkles?
A. Have you ever tried to iron a monster?
Q.
What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
A. Boo boos
Q.
Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep?
A. Because he was coffin!
Q.
Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A. They're good at keeping things under wraps.
Q.
What kind of cereal do monsters eat?
A. Ghost-Toasties
Q.
What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?
A. A wash and wear wolf !
Q.
What's the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car?
A. They boo-kle their seatbelts.
Q.
What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
A. Count Duckula
Q.
What do you call a person who puts poison in someone's corn flakes?
A. A cereal killer
Q.
Why are monsters huge and hairy and full of bulges?
A. Because if they were small and round and smooth they'd be M&M's!
Q.
Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A. Because everyone was a goblin!
Q.
How did the ghost patch his sheet?
A. With a pumpkin patch.
Q.
What is as sharp as a vampire's fang?
A. His other fang.
Q:
What do the birds sing on Halloween?
A: Twick or Tweet
Q:
What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
A: Tomb-stones!
Q:
Why should a skeleton drink 10 glasses of milk a day?
A: It's good for their bones.
Q:
What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
A: White Pillowcases
Q:
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
A: Squash
Q:
Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game?
A: Their bats flew away!
Q:
What was the witches favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling
Q:
What does a vampire fear most?
A: Tooth decay
Q:
Where did the vampire open a savings account?
A: At a blood bank!
Q:
What did the mad scientist eat on Halloween?
A: Frankenfurters!
Q:
Where do mummies go for a swim?
A: To the Dead Sea.
Q:
What is Transylvania?
A: Dracula's terror-tory
Q:
Where does Dracula water ski?
A: On Lake Eerie
Q:
What kind of boat pulls Dracula when he water skis?
A: A blood vessel.
Q:
What do you get when you divide the diameter of a Jack O'Lantern
by it's circumference?
A: Pumpkin Pi
Q:
Why are there fences around cemeteries?
A: Because people are dying to get in.
Q:
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn't have the guts.
Q:
What does a ghost eat for lunch?
A: A BOO-logna sandwich.
Q:
What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don't spook until your spooken to.
Q:
Why do ghouls and demons hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghoul's best friend!
Q:
What happened to the guy who couldn't keep up payments to his
exorcist?
A: He was repossessed.
Q:
What instrument does a skeleton play
A: A Trom-BONE
Q:
Who was the most famous witch detective?
A: Warlock Holmes
Q:
Where does a ghost go to refuel his car?
A: Aghas-tly station
Q:
What do you get when you cross a black cat with a lemon?
A: A sour puss!
Q:
What do monsters call their parents?
A: Mummy and Deady
Q:
What goes on a ghost's desert?
A: Whipped Scream
Q:
What is Dracula's favorite holiday?
A: Fangs-giving!
Q:
What kind of makeup do ghosts use?
A: Mas-scare-a
Q:
What is the ghosts favorite drink?
A: Ghoul Ade
Q:
What type of music does a mummy like?
A: Wrap !
Q:
What kind of witch goes to the beach?
A: A sand-witch
Q:
How do we know vampires like baseball?
A: Every nite they turn into bats!
Q:
How does a girl vampire flirt?
A: She "Bats" her eyes
Q:
What song does Dracula hate?
A: Sunshine On My Shoulders |